Saturday, November 17, 2012

Hi Ho, Hi Ho, it's off to the Craft Fair I Go....

Ah.....the bl%%#& craft fair...the big TASK that I am embroiled in at this time of year - and the ensuing mayhem it engenders in this humble artist's life...we will pause here for a general clearing of throats and eye rolling. 
One of my myriad Facebook cronies asked me this morning "what are you making?" and I replied "stuff", after which I thought it was disingenuous of me to respond that way, so I took the above photo. What you don't know from that seemingly innocuous statement, is the 'back story' that preceded the photo shoot. 
First of all, when the Craft Fair rolls around each year at this time, I'm usually doing something else - like painting - and when the phone starts ringing and the folks start bleeting about reserving tables....I'm not ready for the whole shooting match. I put them off for another couple of weeks meanwhile scrambling madly trying to remember where the frelling heck I put the darn "Craft Fair" file. I will generally locate it in the last place I look as it was that 'can't forget this' place in the studio that is. Forgotten, I mean.
So I pull out my file, make a poster, post a Facebook page ('cause that's how you roll in this day and age), submit ad to paper, radio, etc. and start the spread sheet with names, contact info, # of tables wanted and items being sold and field the plethora of calls and emails and get my list together and deal with the 'crankies' and try to accommodate the masses. From there we mock up a to-scale floor plan and cut out a bazzillion little tables (to scale as well) and foodle around with getting as many tables as I can into the allotted space - and allowing for the fact no-one wants to go on the stage....(too bad). We then glue down all these little 'tables' and proceed to assign places, keeping in mind who's selling what and who wants to be near who (and visa versa on that) (small town). Great screaming vendors, I'm just exhausted writing that. And! I almost forgot...making directional sandwich boards for the day. (Now, I AM tired.)
Meanwhile, meanwhile, I myself am figuring out what I will be making to sell and generally getting ideas at the last minute. That's my table up there with the 'stuff' of which I am making the last minute things right now.....and why we are frittering away these precious moments blogging escapes me...oh wait! It's guilt about not posting....anyworld'ssmallestviolinway, that brings us all up to this point in time. Me at Keyboard, you with coffee. 
And the story. 
Yesterday, in the midst of all this holy hell, my sewing machine broke down. This was not optimum at this point with me sewing some small baby toys (there has been a boom of kiddies in my town...or is it just I am that old ...eesh) I was pretty discombobulated and posted this on my Facebook status.  Along with some colorful language.....
"AAAAUUUGH! The sewing machine just went FOOBAR and I haven't finished my sewing for the Craft Fair! FRACKING FRRACKSHINICKING FRUNKLLESCHNITS!!
poop" be precise. I then spent the rest of the day trying to screw around with the machine to make it work. Sewing by hand was not an option. Period. 
So here's what we found out from that. 
#1. The machine is not capable of sewing stretch fabric.
     - changed all fabric to plain old cotton and re cut all patterns
#2. The machine must be equipped with proper needles and thread for project undertaken
      - Duh. 

It defies description to be me. 

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